mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Holy shit dude........stairs
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize