Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
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