Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
last night I used snow as a chaser
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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