When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize