I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
