Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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