she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
