nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize