Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
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