:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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