I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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