so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
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