Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Randomize
