Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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