well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
