Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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