All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
now i know why i became what i already was.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
