we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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