so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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