He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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