I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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