I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
