i barfeds in our rink
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
