I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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