dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Randomize
