Betty ford says i'm here all night
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
