that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
