Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
