My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
