i think my mom watched the whole time
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I am mentally ready for anal.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
