Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
