I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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