There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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