so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
