hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
We had sex on a dog bed..
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize