seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
