We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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