Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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