I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
