yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
