problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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