I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
