So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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