i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
