We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
