I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
