maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
