he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize