Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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