Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
