some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
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